Home Sweet Home?

Hello,     this is my first blog of many I hope. I just moved from Chicago to Miami/Homestead and let me tell you It has been awesome. 24 hours of sitting in a middle seat of a uhaul truck with 2 of my older brothers beside me. Talk about “Me Time!!” We had a great time driving down. We went through heavy rain, through the hills, and some quite time driving through the early am fog in florida. We arrive home. To my new home. I cant explain the feeling of the leaving the comfort of my parents house to this huge beautiful empty house that is mine. Its like I thought to myself “wow I am finally growing up” lol. But what does this house mean? Why am I here? Why did I Leave? All these questions start to run through my head. I get scared now… What if this is too much? What if I am not ready to be alone? As all these thoughts ran through my head, I sit back and ask myself “well Alex what do you want? and I remember way before leaving chicago I said to myself. Well what is going to happen to me? Why I am here? What is my purpose? I mean I thought I had it all together. I was doing music full-time. Traveling and seeing things others may never get to see. Then it hit me. I was totally running from what God really wanted me to do. I didn’t mention God or my faith at the beginning of this blog for a reason. I was just thinking of myself for a long time and I realized that there is so much more to me than what I thought. You know there are many details on how I got here and where I have been, but I don’t want to miss the big picture in my life. I am 21 years old and its a tough time period to decide to follow God with all my heart. I have made many mistakes growing up and the one thing i have learned is that Gods love for me will never change, and I know everyone says this but I asked god to reveal his plan to me then and there. I said “God i know you exist and i know you can hear me I’m tired of living a life that is so routine. Show me what you want me to do” He didn’t call my cell 5 minutes later and tell me his plan. it took work from me I needed to search I had to do some type of work and actually move. I picked up my bible and just started t read a few things here and there. days pass and still nothing. I reached a point where I was frustrated with myself and with God. So I went back to what playing music. Took a trip to Miami I think it was a week trip to play some shows with the Saturn Project. The day before I left though there was an offer to move to Miami… a potential job, to be a youth pastor. I thought Youth Pastor?? “yea right” Aren’t I suppose to do music full time somehow with my own band? So I went home and thought and thought well what should I do? The “what ifs” came back again. One night I wont forget I went through something… something that never has happened to me before. I was in tears outside my houseI looked into the sky and thought “wow this world is so big I’m just a tiny little spec of life.” If I truly believe in God and truly believe that he created this whole universe then I must work for him! I need answers to all this. I need to see him without seeing him. My decision was made then and there I will move Miami. I will finally stop thinking of myself and what I want and do what God wants me to do. As long as it is day I will do the work of he who sent me. So Yes I Am Home Sweet Home!!